Friday, February 25, 2011

The death knight who dreamed of turning 85

After the bar fight the other night I figured we could need something more lighthearted as a Friday night snack.

I thought long and hard about it and to be entirely truthful I had a hard time to find anything cheerful to talk about.

I remember how a game friend once said to me something along the lines: “You know, when WoW is good, it can be SO good. And when it’s bad, it’s SO bad”. Indeed. While I don’t hold it for truth for everyone, and there certainly are players who walk around, eternally stuck on some sort of average, “OK” level of happiness, my own curve tends to be a bit bumpier, spiking from time to time in both directions.

Recently it has spiked downwards. I won't go into any details, because I can’t at the moment (it has nothing to do with blogging drama though). All I can say is that I've spent a few hours crying and a sleepless night this week over WoW, how pitiful it may sound.

Crying can be a relief sometimes, but is frustrating when you like me have to hide it since the people I have around me in real life have zero understanding of why you ever would care so much about some” imaginary friends” in a game.

WoW sucks sometimes. It really does.

An application
But lo and behold, something popped up in our guild forums that actually gave me a huge smile and I thought I’d share it with you because I'd like to spend this Friday night at the inn in a slightly happier mood.

It was an application to our guild, which – in case anyone missed it – is a fairly serious raiding guild with high expectations on our potential new members, which I think is obvious from our website. Those expectations didn’t stop this daring young man to try his luck as in the following. And yes, in case you’re wondering, he does exist for real. It’s not a hoax; I checked in Armory. However, I’ve changed his name here slightly and hidden his guild in order to protect him. Motherly Larísa is motherly.

Name: dkmaster

Class: Death Knight

Level: 82

Race: Gnome

Country: england

Age: 14

Gender: male

Occupation/Study: go to school

Professions and skill level: engineering = 452, balcksmith = 111

Talents: frost and unholy

Would you be willing to adjust your talents where necessary? (Yes/No): yes

What do you feel are your core PVE stats? (Please do NOT link your armory profile here, this is for you to tell us what you feel your core PVE stats are): good

Our raid days are Sun-Tues-Thurs 20:00 - 23:30 (server time) How many of these raids are you able to attend each week? dont no but can try

Please outline your previous raiding experience Pre-Cata - Cata -: good did afew raids, done none yet

Who is/was your current/last guild and why are you looking to leave/why did you leave them?: [guild name] abd i am leaveing as it is a lvl 1 guild and there is like no one in it

Do you have Ventrilo and a working Microphone? No but can get soon

Are you playing with a stable internet connection and computer? yes

What are your expectations of Adrenaline? that it is a very friendly guild and i will have fun in it if i get in

Please tell us a little about yourself and also about your aims within the game. my aims r to be lvl 85, have fun and be in th eadrenaline

How did you hear about Adrenaline? a member in the guild told me about it

Toast of the week
I mean: isn’t he just adorable? Reading this I wanted to hug this little gnomish death knight, keeping him as a pet. Poor little creature, stuck in a level 1 guild with no one around him. It sounds tough.

May he remain as he is, innocent, sparkle eyed, with the goal to reach level 85 and to find a friendly, fun guild. May he never grow up and turn into a cynic, disillusioned veteran! May he level his “balcksmithing” beyond 111!

Dkmaster, I doubt that you read this post. However, you brought a smile to my face in a moment when I needed it. Thank you. This one is for you.


And now if you excuse me I'll just grab an armchair by the fire and doze for a while. I think I need a rest.


Ratshag said...

Takes me pants-less table dancing to the far side of the inn so as nots ta disturb the sleeping gnome.

Runzwithfire said...

AHMYGOD, adorable DK is super adorable. I almost imagine him standing there, application in hand, looking up at you with eyes wider than Puss in Boots from the Shrek films. OK that's sounds condescending but it just reminds me of my first bright eyed forays into WoW full of promise, hope and idealism.

BTW the lunchtime sandwich was so good, I came back for dinner *peers over at the pantless orc dancing on the table* and the Friday night entertainment has arrived I see.

Bri said...

Good for you Larisa. I can't think of many WoW blogs that wouldn't tear this guy a new orifice for the heinous crime of being a clueless noob. Guild apps like this are always posted to blogs to point at as objects of ridicule and derision. You've restored my faith.

Imraith Dos Santos said...

Sooo...did you let him in? Or did you perhaps offer him some "motherly" advice about finding a leveling guild? Did he stay in his level one guild? I must know the fate of this impudent youth!

SpiritusRex said...

Aye, t'is a good story which has brightened my day.

Spiritus yells from his seat by the fire,

"You! You, great, ghastly glubbernuggin' orc! Get yer enormous green arse off the table! This is a respectable Inn unlike the ones in the Barrens you're most familiar with! Besides, some things once seen can never be unseen."

Really? Larisa? Really?
I'm starting to wonder if your "all are welcomed" policy needs some revisiting.

Syl said...

I actually thought for the longest time that the app was another fake by our tech-admin who wrote a strikingly similar one not so long ago when we re-created the page! lol :D

redcow said...

"What do you feel are your core PVE stats?: good"

Ok so everything about this is adorable but this is so funny!! Bless his little gnome heart!

Len said...

Sometimes noobs are just noobs - people who enjoy playing the game but don't really know much about it. It's almost refreshing!

Reverend Zor said...

Ah, to be able to go back to times when I played the game like your dkmaster. I miss those days.

Thank you for not ridicule the applicant; to many people forget that we all started this way.

Stubborn said...

Don't let it get you down. We've all had our ins and outs with WoW. I left and played DDO for six months, LotRO for six months, Conan, etc etc due to bad guild breakup after bad guild breakup.

These things always resolve themselves over time, and even when they don't, it's never really WoW's fault, so you'll find yourself enjoying another aspect of the game eventually.

Stick in there (:

Vidyala said...

I hope things pick up for you, Larisa! I empathize - sometimes things can be so hard and it makes it worse that real life people around you may not "get it."

D'aww to the little Gnome DK. I hope even if he didn't join your guild he finds another one that has some people in it and has fun with the game. :D

klokbok said...

Ours not to reason why. Ours just to do or die. Again.

(Unoffical motto for Death Knights)

Oh, but If I had the backbone (not to mention the ability to handle stress), I would go raiding Just Right Now.

Sadly, my mind appears to be stuck in the salesman burnout phase (wich happened almost six years ago); any given dungeon my pulse turn 180 :/

I somehow wish they would implement a "Big Lebronsky" raid, where 10 or 25 people get together to ... well ... bowl.

And save a rug.

And spread some ash.

Silly, you know. I want to raid, but can't. So I'm stuck with going over the same quests over and over again, 'cause them are a controlled environment, and the second I hit a PuG or even guild run of a dungeon I forget to breathe and my armpits turns wet and the mouse gets all sloppy from sweaty palms and everything in my body screams "Get the fuck away from that tiger you idoit!" (and yes, there is a meta reference to a swedish film in there).

(I have no idea why I'm writing this. Just had to ... well. Vent, I guess. Sorry.)

Kialesse said...

*tiptoes nervously into the bar*

So, um, hi! I couldn't help noticing this seemed to be a nice...

*glances at the pantless, table-dancing orc*

... wholesome place to have a sandwich and a pint, and I wondered if I might join you? See these two guys I used to know, one of whom had this name that sounded a lot a kind of exotic fruit and one that seemed to be against premarital sexual congress, they had this really great place where I used to hang out and stuff. And then, they went and boarded it up, so I'm feeling a little homeless.

Can I stay awhile? You seem to be okay with rag-tag homeless people like that ADORABLE tiny DK I just passed in the hall. I would feed him, but I'm afraid that he would follow me home afterward.

Ron said...

This post showed me how utterly jaded I am. As I was reading the application all I can think of in my head was "fail". Your reaction at the bottom made me reread it, keeping in mind that the kid was young.

I guess i'm used to dealing with people who should know better but don't, not people who just don't know.

Thank you for bringing it back, just a bit.

Clovis said...

Aw that was a cute post Larisa. I'm glad you didn't just call him a noob and went on your way.

Hope you'll find this weekend in better light. Being sad isn't fun! *hug*

Nikodhemus said...

How considerate of you, Ratters...

This is exactly something Gevlon would flip out over for his PUG. And, its good that in your experience as a fairly serious raider that you can look at this and smile...

Nube said...

I miss those dreams. Really refreshing post, keep strong.

Azurae said...

Cheers to you Larisa!

This post is the perfect example of why I come to the Inn almost every day.

Your viewpoint reminds me to strive for a better me.. instead of the cynical player that I've become.


p.s. I too would like to know what happened with the DK.

p.p.s. *hugs* I'm sorry you are having WoW caused sadness. I hope it gets better.

Gevlon said...

This application draw smile to my face too. Perfect moron specimen you found. Too bad you changed his name. Next time send such to me!

Please note that he is from "england" (instead of "England") with terrible grammar, spelling, "i" and no capitalization. A 14 years old non-moron student should write much better in his native tongue.

Krytus said...

I agree with Gevlon. He is 14 y.o. not 4. His application doesn't say "I'm a new guy and need some help with the game", it's more like "i cba to fill and application. i'm gonna leech of all you friedly people lols."

Andrei said...

I hoped that creeps would stay away from such kind and inspirational post. But no Gevlon is here in full force. Neither Larisa nor you really know who this person is in real life. So you see what you want to see. Each one according to his kind. In situation where Larisa finds inspiration and kindness Gevlon only finds opportunity to insult and ridicule.

Gevlon please kindly crawl back to your hole.

Magma said...

You imply there is no reason one would ridicule such an application. Clearly the reason is there. Applying to such a serious raiding guild with such an application is a joke.

Can you imagine if he applied for a job with similar answers? He sure as hell would never get a phone call, unless it was to laugh at him.

Regardless of whether he was attempting to leech or was purely innocent, doesn't change the fact it was a terrible application.

Perdissa said...

This reminds me of my kid cousin's homework I saw the other day.

Question: Expand the following function

( x + 2 )2
( x + 2 )2
( x + 2 )2

The 2 at the back denotes square, but I can't put a superscript here.

Anonymous said...

1. If the kid is genuine, he tried his best to improve his situation and I say good for him. 2. @Gevlon, you are totally awesome and your analysis of the game is dead on,… but are you really serious? Are you criticizing someone over grammar, I don’t know your native language, but I have never read an error free post on your site evvvvvaahhhhh. 3. Great post.

Magma said...

@Last Anon
Gev's first language is not English. One of his most recent posts even says that blatantly.

Larísa said...

@Ratshag: no problem, I’m already sound asleep.

: Indeed. I think they should make a mini version of him for the online store. Reminds me of the moonkin hatchling. Oh and just ask in the bar, someone will cook a dinner for you even if the innkeeper is asleep.

I think you’ll find someone in the bar that can give you dinner if I’m asleep.

@Bri: The idea to ridicule him didn’t cross my mind tbh. He’s not an idiot with a too big ego. Just a kid who likes to have fun. Nothing to mock about that.

@Imraith Dos Santos: I’m afraid we didn’t. But I wasn’t alone in my motherly feelings for him, I assure you.

: Hehe… Nah, with your spirit around guarding, I think we’ll make just fine as it is. Have another one!

@Syl: It appeared almost too good to be true. But wolf’s testimony that he had spoken to the kid convinced me.

@Redcow: Yep! I want to have good core stats too! I should totally ask him where to get that.

@Len: We’ve all been there, haven’t we? And gosh, I feel nostalgic thinking about it.

Zor: So do I, so do I. Sometimes I wish I could take a time machine back and watch Larísa over her shoulder as she died from the defies in Elwyn and despaired…

: We’ll see how things turn out. I guess I’ll blog about it, eventually.

@Vidyala: He would no doubt be a good fit for a more social levelling guild, preferably a big one. I hope he’ll find a place he can call home.

@Klokbok: Thank you for venting. That’s what we’re here for, isn’t it? It sounds so sad to not be able to even run a dungeon due to your condition. Doomed to quest forever. I wish I could give you some good advice but I really can’t. So let’s just sit here and watch the fire dancing and feel at home among friends where we dare to admit that we’re not perfect.

Larísa said...

: I think you’ve found your refugee. Restless people, people in rags, less-than-perfect players… orcs without pants… yep. This is the place for us.
Have a pint and a seat and yes, of course you can take off your shoes, but please leave them in the hallway, you seem to have walked far to so say… Welcome home!

@Ron: Thank you, I’m glad if I can help to give some perspective on things. It’s easy to get a bit stuck with the jaded eyeglasses.

@Clovis: Thank you. Hugs!

: Yeah, it’s a good candidate for M&S of the week if you’re into that kind of writing. I’m not.

@Nube: Thanks!

@Azruae: Thank you! I just checked him in armory. Still 82 in his lvl 1 guild. He had a blue ring on his hand, with intellect as one of the major stats… I suppose it looked shiny though! Bless him.

@Gevlon: I’m afraid I’m probably not the best provider of M&S material to your blog. I tend to look for the good in people. I actually think the lack of spelling and grammar is the least of problems in this application.

@Krytus: I think you read a lot into it that I’m not so sure really is there.

@Andrei: I know you mean well, but Gevlon is special to me. He was born here at the inn. It’s absolutely OK for him to speak his heart. I’m sort of fond of him.

@Magma: I don’t think anyone has suggested it wasn’t terrible. But something can be terrible and yet irresistibly charming.

: Hehe, that was almost clever, wasn’t it?

& Magma: yeah, I’m afraid Gevlon just like me is one of those who mistreats the English language from time to time. There was a recent post over at Raging Monkeys on this topic that I suggest you to read!

Copra said...

i guess he really knows not what guild kind of type hes applying to, but he is sincere and polite. More than most of the commentators.

My 10 year old son, who doesn't speak nor understand English, plays a lv63 DK. He goes to PUG's because he likes the instances.

He scores in the top two in Recount. Every. Single. Time.

Now his chat is non existing, his knowledge of his class is minimal and his glyphs, skills and talents are taken from WoWPopular to the point.

Now I'd like to know how this kind of player, after gaining a few english words in vocabulary, be rated, in general.

He is a new player as whole. Loves the game in all ways.

As long as he doesn't say a word, just delivers, he's considered good player. If the group would know of his age - or he tried to chat... - he would be kicked out of the group before it started.

I can see this kid posting the application. He knows the game from his point of view. He knows - through the tutorial levelling - that he can cope with the mobs. Having done some raiding, he knows the dance.

He wants to hook up with the best. To learn or to hang around, what ever.

I rise a toast to his guts to even apply.

I'm shamed of the 'older' players looking for the min-max breakup of his characters, rotation and gearing decisions. The leet who have ruined the joy of the game to the last comma just for the sake of winning.

The kid is winning, because he's still enjoying the game. To the fullest.

C out

Holly said...

I can has guild? I r want funs!

Adorable but cringe worthy.

But this is where the anonymity of the internets is in favor of the one denying the application, making a little kid cry is much easier when you don't see the tears.

Remember, you crush his hopes and dreams!

...*innocent face*

did I troll good?

Perdissa said...

@ Copra

Players like that are completely fine. I have pugged with very young players before, as well as a weird pug where everyone was married and we were discussing our spouses' response to our playing WoW. To put things in perspective, there are more people playing WoW in the world than there are people in my little country. I'd imagine that the playerbase cuts across an imaginably wide demographic pie.

In general, if a player is not being abusive or a jerk in general, I'm fine with that. If he is socially awkward, I'm also fine with that. Even if the skill of the player makes it difficult to complete the dungeon, I am still fine with that.

I often try to give people like that the benefit of the doubt. He could be a new player, may not speak English, or could simply be very young.

Mogul said...

Wonderful - thanks for bringing this one to the Inn. I loved the response that he gave a few times of "good"! This great response shows he's in it for the right reasons. : )

Silvershaft said...

This is my first blog comment, so please bear with me if this isn't incredibly clear or concise, although I'll certainly try to make it so.

I am at a middle road between the Goblin's opinion and Larissa's point of view.

From one perspective I do believe that dkmaster's attitude certainly puts people of his age group in the wrong light (I'm 15 myself, turning 16 in approximately 3 weeks). His application was certainly inconsiderate of the type of guild he was joining, and as he is 14 (nearly in high school, if not already in it) he should have enough intelligence to look around and gain awareness of his surroundings. He should also have the maturity to realize that there is more to this than your standard conversation with a friend, and that he should have put a bit more effort into this document (or better yet leave it entirely).

However, Larissa's premise also partially won me over. If not the cuteness, the innocence is something I feel some empathy towards. I'm not sure if it's appropriate to explain my story, but until around I was 13 years old I was simply playing WoW with friends, much like dkmaster probably is. I was not a renowned player nor a very tactical one, and consequently often enchanted and gemmed whatever first came to my notice.

Due to some personal problems regarding my friends (which I cannot disclose) I found myself playing more or less alone, and it is only then that I opened my eyes, so to speak. I was predominantly a PvP player beforehand, mindlessly joining battlegrounds to nuke random Horde for fun. However, I asked myself why I was doing this and for what purpose. I realized that my gems and enchants were embarrassingly sub-optimal (attack power on a death knight, for example), and I immediately opted to fix this. While not being able to confirm this as a fact, I think that from then on I matured in all aspects of my life, including schooling (something which the majority of youth who play WoW seem to ignore, sadly), which is why I have not touched WoW in 3 months.

What does this second point have to do with the situation at hand? Well, I believe that dkmaster has not found that sense of maturity and is still in that realm of "innocence" that surrounds kids at around 10-12. I think that he simply has not broken out of that bind yet, and I hope that when he does he does so with the right mentality (unlike the vast quantity of under-age drinkers and smokers who "litter" society).

So yes, I'm at a standstill. Although due to the quantity of my writing one may feel that I am more towards Larissa's point of view this is really not the case. I really do think that it is those sorts of people who encourage guild leaders to ignore anyone under 18 who applies to their guilds, and I therefore find his behavior instinctively atrocious.

That's my opinion, at least. I hope this has been a somewhat organized wall of text. Sorry if it may sound like a slight vent.

Larísa said...

: You put yourself very clearly. I'm amazed at seeing this level of maturity and writing skills coming from someone at your age. It may have been your first blog comment ever, but I hope it's not the last one. It's lovely to have you here participating in the discussions. (But noooo, we don't serve beer to underaged, I'm sorry, you'll have to do with the non-alcolholic versions at least as long as I'm watching.;))